Lived Experiences of Divorced Women: Psychosocial Effects in Robe Town Oromia, South Eastern, Ethiopia

Divorce is the legal dissolution of a socially and legally recognized marital relationship that alters the obligations and privileges of the two persons involved. Hence, the main objective of this study was to assess the lived experience of divorced women in Bale Robe town. Purposive sampling was used to select sampling Kebeles since all Kebeles are assuming to be having a similar attribute in the case of divorce experience. The target populations were selected purposively and snowballing sampling techniques. To get the relevant data for this study the data has employed a qualitative, in-depth interview method with the combination of focused group discussion. The researcher used 12 divorced women for an in-depth interview, six divorced women for focused group discussion and six key informants for an in-depth interview. Thematic qualitative analysis technique has been employed by applying a rigorous data analysis procedure. As the result indicated Divorced women experience different psychological problems like anger, grief, feeling of lonely, regret and husband denying biological child. Also, the study revealed that divorce exposed them to social, familial, nancial and emotional challenges. Therefore, government, non-governmental organization and social workers should play an important role in family counseling services, increasing public awareness about the social environment and marriage stability.


Introduction
Family is said to be the rst institution where one starts to equip oneself to grow. According to Olson and Disfraim (2000), a family can be de ned as two or more people who are committed to each other and who share intimacy, resources, decision-making responsibilities, and values. Family is the natural and fundamental unit of society and is entitled to protection by society and the state. The family operates as a group or family system. For Serkalem (2006), in many societies family, which is the rst social unit of organization, has given emphasis starting from its formation. The road to enter family life is marriage.
Schwartz and Scott ( as cited in Adamu & Temesgen, 2014,p. 8), marriage is de ned as "A union between people that unite them sexually, socially, and economically that is relatively consistent over time; and that accords each person certain agreed-upon rights." Marriage is a union of couples commits to one another with the expectation of a stable and lasting intimate relationship, and this is socially recognized and approved. According to, David and John (as cited in Admassu, 2013, p. 2) de ned marriage as the emotional and legal commitment of two people to share emotional and physical intimacy, various tasks and economic resources. Marriage is the way through which society enters a basic institution of family formation Makara (2009). It is a social institution that unites people in a special form of mutual dependence to nd and maintain a family.
Still, marriage has become a private relationship based on personal satisfaction rather than a covenant built on mutual ful llment and responsibilities (Admassu, 2013). Makinde (2004a) asserts that the function of marriage is to provide happiness, security, cultural growth, and development of a sense of responsibility for enhancing continuity and societal perpetuation. Marriage is arranged through public or civil, religious and/or traditional ceremony (Aster, 2015,p. 1) Marriage re ects the purposes, character, and customs of the society in which it is found. Marriage is important for a transition of socio-economic values from old to young generation (Aster, 2015, p. 1).
However, divorce has pervasive weakening effects on the family Mehari (2013). Thus, it is one of the major troubles that affect the family system. Divorce may be a single event dissolving the marriage, but both divorce initiators and non-initiators lose their spouses, their intact families, and their familiar routines, and they tend to struggle to build new lives and relationships Baum (2007). The changes in family composition, family roles, relationships and economic circumstance profound implications and can have a signi cant impact on family functioning González, & Viitanen (as cited in Selome, 2007).
Divorce is the "legal dissolution of a socially and legally recognized marital relationship that alters the obligations and privileges of the two persons involved." It is also a major life transition that has farreaching social, pathological, legal, personal, economic, and personal consequences." Price & Mc Kenry (as cited in Sharma, 2011) divorce also has psychological, economic and social impacts on the divorcees (Serkalem, 2006). According to several researchers divorce is one of the most stressful and emotional events in the life of an individual facing the transformation of their family system. Researchers (Amato and Booth 1991, Clarke-Stewart and Brentano 2006, cited in Sharma, 2011 con rm its complex and longterm consequences in the lives of all family members, especially focusing on determining long-term effects on the development of children and adults, respectively. During the rst year after the divorce, custodial mothers were more anxious, depressed, angry, and self-doubting than were married mothers (Hetherington, 1999). They also showed comparatively less affection to their children, communicated less with them, punished them more, and were more inconsistent in their use of the discipline (Amato, 1993).
On average, divorced women suffer more frequently from anxiety, depression, anger, and feelings of incompetence, rejection, and loneliness. They are more distressed and depressed than married or single women. According to several researchers (Kitson, 1992, Amato 2000, 1274Hetherington andKelly 2002, cited in Klobucar, 2015), however; not all emotional changes accompanying and the following divorce is negative. As a result of divorced women often develop new talents, gain new awareness and improve self-con dence.
Divorce involves major changes in all family functions. The economic, solidarity and social functions know a destructing, or in couples with children, a resizing of mostly negative. Divorce has as a rst effect the family loss of psycho-affective function, weakening or breaking formal and informal relationships between partners (Klobucar, 2015).
Divorce has become a serious problem; challenging the establishment of the family routinely and causing severe impacts on the emotional and mental health of the individual especially, women. Since women are considered as the binding force in the family, they are believed to be responsible for whatever wrong is done (Yohannes, 2015). It has been argued that women invest more in the family, take a larger responsibility for marriage, and therefore perceive divorce as a greater failure than do men ( Kung & Chan, 2004, cited in Sharma, 2011, p. 125).
Furthermore, in Ethiopia, it is believed that divorce brings many di culties for women. Studies have shown that many women who are living in third world countries like Ethiopia have fewer choices in life other than getting married and having children. Most Ethiopian women are dependent on their husbands nancially and they are less prepared for careers Daniel, (as cited in Selome, 2007). The psychosocial impacts of divorce on women are complicated. Therefore, this study focuses on assessing the psychosocial effects on women. The study included women who were involved in a divorce.

Research Question
To investigate the lived experiences of divorced women, the following question has been used as leading questions.
What are the common psychosocial problems that divorced women have faced in Robe Town?
The objective of the study To examine the common psychosocial problems that divorced women have faced.

Description of the Study Area
The study was conducted in Robe Town which is in Bale Zone, located in South-Eastern Ethiopia. It is also located about 430 km to the southeast of the national capital, Addis Ababa. The total area of the town is 8024 km2. According to the national survey made by CSA in 2007, the total number of households in Robe Town is about 13,471. Among this 48.08% practice Muslim religion, while 45.02% of the population practiced Ethiopian Orthodox Christianity and 6.13% were Protestant. Notable tourist attractions include the Sof-Omar Caves, which lie to the east. There is also a teachers-training college, and university here called Madda Walabu University. Madda Walabu University is also playing a Paraamount role for the development of this town because there is a massive ow of money, manpower such as instructors, administrative staff and students. Furthermore, due to its strategic location, all-district roads to different small towns of Bale Zone pass via by implication bene t the residents in many ways such as economically, socially and politically.

Research Design
To achieve the objective of the study, the researcher has used a qualitative research method. Qualitative research allows the researcher to explore the identi ed social problem in its social context and to nd new things along the way. As qualitative research method life story is an interactive interview in the narrative form where the interviewer asks open-ended, short questions awaiting long and detailed answers.

Participants
The study was conducted on participants of speci c women who have experience of divorce. Divorced women were drawn from the three kebeles namely; Oda Robe, Baha Biftu and Café Donsa. Therefore, based on the aforementioned points, the researcher had selected a total of 18 participants and conducted the study. Out of the total gure, twelve (12) of them were assigned for the in-depth interview, six (6) out of them selected for the Focus Group Discussion (FGD). To select a sampling area purposive sampling method was used. The three kebeles' namely: Oda Robe, Baha Biftu and Caffe Donsa were selected using purposive sampling techniques to explore and interpret experiences and perceptions of respondents. The participants were chosen in snowballing sampling techniques can grow a network of participants by taking advantage of the relationship within current participants.

Data Collection Instrument
This study utilized semi-structured interviews and focus group discussions (FGD) were the main tools.

A.Semi -Structure Interview
To collect data from the subjects, a semi-structured interview guide was prepared. The interview guide has two parts. The content of the interview guide was reviewed and made the necessary amendment to the content of the interview. The content of the interview guide covered psychological and social issues used for divorced women who were selected for the in-depth interview. The interview guide was an openended question that permits the respondent to generate the answer and may produce some very interesting responses.

B.Focus Group Discussion Guides
Focus group attempts to mimic everyday conversations between groups of people and re ects how people come to an understanding of an issue or experience through both telling their own 'story' and listening to others. For this reason, a focus group was conducted together with additional data about their lived experience of divorced women'. The focus group consisted of six participants. One participant had been an interview participant. The reason that included in the focus group may facilitate the discussion.
The remaining ve participants were new to the study. Participants have informed about the purpose of the study, ethical considerations, data collection methods and all information relating to reason as the nding of the data.

Methods of Data Analysis
The data was analyzed qualitatively. For the qualitative analysis, the thematic approach as an inductive way of data analysis was used. Thematic analysis was formed through the process of several phases.
The initial phase was internalizing interview voice recorded several times and transcribed the recording verbal and non-verbal cues like pauses, crying, laughing, etc… to capture the meaning associated and made rough notes to make familiar with the data. The researcher used a ctitious name for the analysis of in-depth interviews. Generally, the researcher used the following steps to reach the analysis. These were; familiarization with data, internalized through transcription and translation, the listening of voice records for the number of times for accurate translation. All interviews were translated into English, verbatim, by the researcher. The transcripts were coded on it. In the nal stage, theme development was made and followed by data reduction, simpli cation, de ning and rede ning theme were presented in the nal stages.

Ethical Considerations
Social research in Psychology concerns people's lives and therefore it inevitably involves ethical issues. Before the beginning of the research, informed consent from participants was taken verbally. Attention was given to treating participants with respect throughout the research process. Participants have fully informed the purpose and nature of research, the right to withdraw from the research at any time if they felt uncomfortable with the process or if they felt that they would not able to continue with research for whatever reason, and the issue of con dentially and anonymity. The participants were informed of this ethical consideration so that they are aware of their rights as they commit to participate in the research. Participation in the study was voluntary.

Results And Discussion
This chapter presents results obtained from data gathered through in-depth interviews, Their presentation is made thematic based on the research interview questions and in line with the objective of the study.

Demographic Characteristics of Respondents
The Age Range The interview was conducted with a total of 12 (twelve) out of 18 (eighteen) divorced women who live in Odaa Robe, Baha Biftu and Caffe Donsa in Robe Town. The data obtained through the interview revealed that these participants were divorced women. The data obtained from the respondents showed that the majority of them found within the age of 20-30 years old.

Educational status and type of occupation
Out of 12(twelve) in-depth interviews, 9 (nine) of them completed secondary education and involved in private business.
The main ndings of the study Psychological Impacts of Divorce According to Amato (2000), people's reactions vary considerably in the face of divorce due to multiple factors. Some people appear to bene t in a certain respect from the divorce while some fall into a downward spiral from which they never recover. Others may only experience temporally decrements in their well-being as a result of divorce. The following sections will consider research ndings that highlight the varies psychological effects of divorce on women as identi ed by the research participants.
During the in-depth interview, the majority of the participants reported that divorce left them in; I.Anger, Fear, Ashamed, Grief Out of (twelve) in-depth interviewed participants; four of them explained that divorce left them in anger, fear, and feeling of ashamed. Because they hadn't been continued their marriage for the rest of their life. These participants were also narrated that they were suffering and embarrassment while in the process.
Those suffering were depression, upset, anger frustration, feeling of isolation, the dismay of losing an important person from their life and feeling of departing. In-depth interview informant narrated that: One of the informants My mind was greatly disturbed. I feel ashamed. He left me with my three children and sent me a divorce charge. I never forgot about the situation. I felt sorry. When I recovered from the situation, I recorded it in my memo. I attempted to hide from my neighbors and relatives. But I couldn't. I went to the courthouse several times. I was afraid when I approaching in front of the court. Even he knew this, why for… uh… why…?em… we have so many possibilities to conclude everything in a friendly way. Her eye was full of tears… The second informant, an in-depth interview participant explained that her account in the following way.
It was the eve of Easter; as usual, I prepared the entire thing that needed for the holiday. According to the Ethiopian culture, you know it was a fasting time. Hen sloughed at night. He never came home I waited for him and tried to call him. But he refused to answer. I did so many attempts to meet with him. Not only I but also my children followed the event. I lay them until my children asleep because they asked me a question related to that holiday ceremony. During the harmony time they know he bought sheep and hen they remained that and asked me questions. I chopped onions for the sloughed hen. But nothing was there. Immediately ideas came to my mind I began to make "Misire wet" and I passed that day with this unforgettable event. Similarly, the key informants from different organizations indicated that women who came into their o ce have gone through di cult situations. They told that women were irresponsive, show a lack of selfcon dence, lack of co-operation, sob bitterly, temper and upset seriously. In FGD the participants explained that they feel sad, depressed, used to inconsistent discipline and dislike interacting with others. They told me that they experienced a feeling of isolation and frustration. The participants in the in-depth interview had a different account in the event of divorce.
They experienced fear, anxiety, feeling of helplessness and uncertainty about their life in general. Thus, this implies that divorce causes brief psychological problems to individuals passing through the process. The process of divorce in uences women's ability to become a positive role model. In line with this during an individual's life course, they experience stressors that hurt their psychological well-being. Also, Handerson (as cited in Kibrom,2008), found that marital break-up causes trauma and stress that disrupts the psychological health of divorcees and expose their lives to jeopardy Vukalovich (as cited in wubedel, 2004).

II. The feeling of lonely and alone
The other psychological impact that identi ed through the in-depth interview was the problem of the feeling of loneliness and alone. Two of the participants expressed that their life as divorced women was feeling alone. One of the women narrated that; "I am having inscredible di culties with parenting. I had a big responsibility, parenting with the absence of a father, managing duties and taking responsibilities alone was tough." These participants described their loss of physical support as well as the loss of friendship with spouses. It was also expressed that the divorcee has affected their psychological status in social participation. The woman whose feelings of self-esteem get affected, sometimes she starts thinking that this happened to her only because she was not a good person, which leads to self-destruction and they feel lonely and alone and in turn depression. This inadvertently leads to isolation and subsequently feeling of loneliness (Amato & Keith 1991).

III. Regret
The marriages were terminated when love and respect were no longer the characteristics of their marriages. Of all the (twelve) women interviewed three participants told how they were distressed by their husband's refusal to share the family's health problem, nancial expenses and mismanaged the shared budget by spending extravagantly and overall irresponsibility.
According to their accounts husbands' reluctance to continue in marriage makes them grief and regret. Therefore grief and regret was the concept that characterized their divorce phase. They conveyed that they experienced stress, anger, grief, and regret when they rst thought of the idea of divorce.

Social Impacts of Divorce
In the current study, divorced women encountered social repercussions of their divorce more in a negative way.
According to Wubedel (2014), after a marital breakup, divorced people tend to cut off most of the couple oriented activities established while married and their social relationships and contacts that were retained in the pre-divorce period are lost within the period. Consequently, the network size of divorced individuals shrinks and undergoes uctuations with different forms of connections and interactions.

A. Neglect and Decline of Family and Social Support
The majority of the divorced women reported that they lived with their parent's house immediately after their divorce in which few shared that they had not good relations with their parents at the beginning because their family and ex-husband's parents were under mental pressure due to to the social stigma.
Women were asked about their social life, family support and relationship with the family of ex-husband and social interaction. (7 out of 12) reported that during the marriage they obtained support from their mother, family, and grandmothers. After the divorcing the relationship intermingled with ex-husband relatives and married friends.
In line with this, in-depth interview participant narrated that her account; When I was with him, his mother, sisters, and brothers came home regularly. They brought us cereal crops such as maize, barley, and etc…... After divorce, no one visited me. I heard when they came from the countryside to the town and I sometimes met them. They didn't want to speak to me and didn't want to invite my children. Even they didn't want to meet with my children. I feel as they hate them. I had a few friends. They know I am in the problem. They weren't voluntary to provide moral, psychological and nancial support. Social relations with ex-husband and friends made me isolate myself from people I know. (One of the participants) In a similar vein, divorced women also face the loss of social support mainly from their ex-husband's relatives and friends whom the couples share. It is also shown that elder women and those from low socio-economic status undergo a more complex time in the aftermath of divorce (Ambert, 2009). The majority of the women in the in-depth interview and FGD revealed that they encounter the same experience with ex-husband relatives. This exposed them to keep a distance from social interaction.
One of the participants reported that; I saw a reaction from society. When I was with him people gave me respect. I shared different issues with my old friends about my life with marred women. My friends didn't want to discuss life experience after I became divorced women. Even they discussed the issue at home when I approached in our 'Baltina' or Mehaber' (social associations). They changed the topic and begun to talk unrelated one. When women came to do it job-related to' mehaber' or 'balitina' at someone's wedding house they were indirectly meek and ignore me. As a result, I don't want to go there. I worked in my small shop fear of neglecting. In my part, I observed social rejection. Married women went to interact with the woman who was married. This made me isolate myself from involving in social activities. People don't give equal attention and consideration for divorced women. They feel that you can't survive and incapability.
From the above narration, one can understand that the life and social status of divorced women are negatively affected by social rejection. As many research participants revealed that -depth interviews and FGD when women cut off their marriage they considered as divorced women but for males didn't work. This nding of the in-depth interview is also supported by the result of the FGD that the informants are also faced with psychological and social problems. Likewise, Mehari (2013) in his nding revealed that social life and the relationship of individuals and couples in their environment is an innate natural behavior of human beings. The disruption of any family hurts the system in general by weakening the bondage between individuals and disrupting the stability and order of the society Mehari (2013).
The data obtained from the interview indicated that women after divorce do not get respect and consideration by their family members. The data gathered show that divorced women experience blame my sister, brothers, and friends.
Similarly, one of the respondents explained that; after my divorce, I returned to my mother's home with my child. I saw a change in my sister's and brother's attitude toward me. My mother … um …. My mum….she was suffering with me. She was always standing with me. She argued them. They do not want to live in that house. My sisters and brother have not been allowed me to involve and give the decision. They do not understand me I was so suffering. They needed to live them the home and told me that I had my private home. My mother attempted to convince them. But they didn't want to consider my mother. I lived with them for my child. ( one of the participants) One can understand from the above narrations that after participants returned to the house of their family, the list of blame against them was increasing in their mothers' house. Several participants also described that they participated in social activities such as 'Edir, Mehaber, and Baltina'.They reported that they performed in high-quality. After divorce, their involvement decline due to interpersonal con ict exposed them not to participate in the social world. They have isolated from them in fear of humiliation and gossiping. Crisis theory assumes that if an individual goes through the phases, then they adjust well, but if they skip any of the phases, problems will appear in later life (Ängarne-Lindberg, 2010, p. 12).
Challenges and Di culties of Single Parenting

Being Single Parent
In this study majority of the participants were single parents. The data obtained in the study revealed that participants faced different problems. Except one all of them had children and their average family sizes were three. All of them lived with their mother. One woman only reported that her child lives with grandmother because of the lake of time to manage and care for her child exposed her to give her child to the grandparent. The participants in the in-depth interview explained that being a single parent needs courage and determination without that di cult to achieve the goal. Three of the respondents explained that the behavioral change observed on their children made them confused.
In-depth interview informant, summarize the view of others in the following way: My rst child is 16 years old. He made several friends. He passed outside all of the time. When I asked him, he answered me rudely. I tried to advise him. He left me home and went to his friends' home. I began to pursue and I went to school. I heard my son never attend class. I approved my son involved in gambling. Even when he came home he didn't want to support me. He used to mobile and engaged on facebook, sending and receiving a massage. His dressing and hear style also uncommon. She replied bitterly. He never listens to me. He reacts negatively. He is disobedience. Now, he is beyond my capacity.
Another in an in-depth interview participant share their account in the following way: Being a single parent made me force my daughter who is attending grade 10 to carry all the responsibility. As you see I occupied myself in cooking. The whole day I spent time preparing, selling and serving. There is no option to leave or change another job. My daughter never let me alone. After school, she spent time with me. Even at night, she prepared the next time meal for our customers. Really to tell you the truth without her life is challenging. She hasn't got time to study. She spent her time with me.
From this one can understand that the inability of the single parent to cope is a result of double responsibilities the respondents' faces which require extra time, attention, and money of the parent.
Hence less attention is paid to the psychological well-being and education of the child makes it somewhat di cult to raise children. Furthermore, they become unable to give su cient time, manage and observe their daily activity and social interaction of their children. Children from single-parent homes are commonly described as more hostile, aggressive, anxious, and fearful, than children from intact families. Couples should be considering the impact of divorce not affect the spouses but also damage the future dream of their children.
Likewise, Ambert (as cited in wubedel, 2014) indicated that after the breakup, single mothers face the hardship of meeting children's needs since they extend their working hours to make a living which reduces their time to devote to their children. A single parent faces doubled responsibilities requiring time, attention and money from the parent. Hence, less attention is paid to the psychological well-being and education of the child. Hence, it is important to think and take time before determined their relationship because of their children.

Fear Of Father Absence
Participants explained that children develop a fear of emotional turmoil when the father does not visit them after divorce. This issue was more critical. Except for one all of the participants had children. After divorce, all of them lived with their mother. All of the participants revealed that children were not visited by their father. In an in-depth interview informant explained that; I observed that my children feel sad and show an emotional reaction toward him. After divorce, she attempted to meet him through the phone. She asked to buy her clothes, shoe, etc… for holiday. Again she ordered him to visit her. He promised her to visit and met in his sisters' house at the time of the holiday. She told to her neighbor children about the promise that heard from her father. She waited the whole day for the coming of her father. He refused to come. She was upset and sobs bitterly. She irritated. On the other day when the call came from her father, she took the mobile and switch off. She didn't want to communicate and didn't listen to him.
Father's absence was exhausting and made children depressing. Two of the women in the study explained that they passed similar experiences. The absence of a father was the most challenging one for their children. Another woman also explained that; When my two children came to school, they told me about father related issues that heard from their friends'. They asked me about their father why they visited them. They told me about other children's fathers. They wanted to meet with him. But I can't do anything. When I did not respond to them, they feel sad." "Ijooleen kiyyaa waa'ee abbaa issaani gaa adda wayitti na gaafatan baa 'ee natty dhagaama.
FGD informants had a similar view on the absence of father lead child for grief and anxiety. Thus children's adjustment to their new condition and women's relatedness effort to compensate absences of the father were challenges for the single mother. The majority of the participants reported that the father never visited their children made them amazing. When the father is absent and the mother is not privileged enough to cater to all the basic needs as well as supervise the academic performance of the child, he/she (the child) will be backward or withdrawn. Hence, father absence exposes children to develop emotional reaction and lack to practice male role model.
Parents face anxiety, exhaustion, and stress after the divorce resulting in the decline of the assistance they give to their children in terms of affections, language stimulation, academic support, emotional support, nancial assistance, and support in social maturity (Kelly, 2000). Furthermore, these types of behavior have all been shown to be higher within divorced families.

Financial Strain
Divorced mother is also trapped in a vicious cycle of nancial problems and another stressful life event. Being a single parent and struggling for money often coincides.
In an in-depth interview respondent revealed that; I spent my life as a housewife for eighteen years. I had four children. Before I transferred to this town I lived in the countryside. My husband engaged in farming and trading. He had a good income. We built a private house. He obtained a chance to go abroad. He sent me money and some assets. I motivated to start trading. I managed home and educated children. When he was abroad I built an additional house which is used for rent. He returned here and asked me for permission to marry another woman. Like that time I was so upset. But I can do nothing. Because of our 'sheria' or religion allow him to marry another. He bought her house in Addis Abeba. He moved between two houses. He took all the money and sent to her. The second wife gave him two children. I stopped running in the market to change our lives and I distressed. He took all the responsibility toward money and put every income under his control. Whenever I asked him for money, he started verbal and physical abuse by using sharp material. He told me that you couldn't have the right to decide on money and assets. He demoralized me. There was also a time that I was not able to provide food, school uniform and pay the school fees for my elder daughter and children. Still, I encountered a problem, I felt sorry when the time approaching to pay the school fee to my daughter. We had land used for agriculture. When I was in the process of divorce he changed the name to other family members and denies me.
Also, another participant reported that; I passed seven years in marriage. I lived with my two children in a rented house. I engaged myself in private business. I struggle to resist nancial di culties. I worked day and night to take care of the children and manage the house chores. I didn't receive su cient child support on time. I paid for milk, bought soap and feeding also challenging me. This is the worst part of my life.
For several participants, they were always vulnerable to depression which resulted as a result of their nancial crisis. In line with this Kotwal and Prabhakar (2009) revealed that nancial problems were the main stressor for the majority of divorced women.

Impact On Children Well -Being
One except all the in-depth interview participants have the same view on the effects of divorce on children's well-being. They reported that their children show the feeling of sad, lonely, impulsive behaviors, lack of cooperation, lack of maintaining relationship this includes engagement and play with peers and not interested to do a school-related activity. The key informants also con rmed that the primary effect of divorce is making to decline the relationship between parent and child. Thus, the child's general psychosocial well-being has been found to decline. Furthermore, studies have revealed that parental divorce has many negative effects on children (Lewis & Sammons, 2001). Academic failure, poor peer relationship and lack of commitment in a relationship are some effects of divorce on children (Lewis & Sammons, 2001). Their view toward themselves is likely to be as having less skill and knowledge to do something successfully, they display more unhappiness and hopelessness and experience feeling of departing to another place in search of quiet or privacy and they experience extreme anxiety or pain (Neuman et al., 1997).

Conclusion
Divorce is multidimensional and it involves multifactor social events. It can be found in every society, which may be either in customary or in legal form.
Divorce was such a problem that breeds many other psychological, emotional instability, economic crisis, and social constraints which compel the divorced women to lead to traumatic life events/ experiences.
Most of the women in-depth interview revealed that faced feeling of guilt, shame, resentment, anger, anxiety about future, feeling lonely and alone, trauma and depression after divorce. The effect of divorce on women has mental and emotional implications that shelter women's self-esteem. It in uences women's ability to become a positive role model. She feels frightened considering herself alone and worthless with none to support or comfort her. Divorce is frequently accompanied by feelings of helplessness, anger, depression, guilt loneliness and other negative emotions. Women are more suffer major economic problems following divorce. Because women usually take custody of the children, they bear greater nancial burdens and face more stress in their lives.
Divorced women didn't meet the basic needs of children such as food and clothing and maintaining the previous standard of living and meet personal expenses, with the situation of economic problems and limited resources. The other nancial challenges that face women denied their property /asset by their husband enabled them not to share their property equally.
Due to divorce statues, children also become deprived of parental affecting, care and support. It is affecting they're well-being, upbringing and socialization process negatively. The data obtained from respondents showed that father absence in their children a life that has severely disrupted their wellbeing. The study has examined women after divorce used to their coping strategies to manage their challenges.
In regards to the social life of divorced women, divorce affects their relationship with ex-husband relatives and friends making them face the challenging of social isolation. Due to divorce, divorced women share social costs of consequence from their family, married friends, and social life. Participants in this study revealed that as a result of their status as divorced women, in different ways the experience of rejection and social isolation. After divorce, losing the existing friends and relatives come as an inevitable process since divorced women no longer belong to the same marital status as their married friends do. Divorced women reported less perceived social support, lower levels of social involvement and less contact with friends than married mothers. While divorced women are characterized by devoting much time and resources on extending personal or family networks, they could not able to raise the social capital while being the only responsible for all needs and activities in the household, which took their time.
Marital life needs to be a more reliable and common understanding and familial commitment between the couples should be strengthened. Spouses should have honest and close communications and sharing of any marital concerns between them and they should look for remedial actions commonly in the self-ruled way of decision making.
Divorce was such a problem that breeds many other social, economic and cultural constraints that compel the divorced women to lead a traumatic life behind the screen of society. Due to divorcee status, children also become deprived of parental affection. Policymakers and researchers have recognized the negative impact family dissolution has on children and have begun to explore ways to reduce the consequences of divorce.
The study recommends that there is a greater need for marital and familial counseling, which should include psychologist, and social workers, and priests. Courts, as well as other agencies, must make better and greater efforts for reconciliation. In other words, a holistic approach is needed both by the government and society. Government and social workers should be provided with training for the different organizations that worked on the family issue.
Laws need strong attention and contribution and work with the government on the side of extramarital affairs and denying property by the husband. Finally, the study recommends that in future a follow-up study should be done to suggest better recommendations about the negative effects of divorce on women, their children, and men. Declarations interpretation of data and commented on and wrote the manuscript for publication. Mulugeta Deribe Damota participated in data analysis and reviewing of the manuscript. All authors approved the nal manuscript.

Not applicable
Availability of data and materials Data are available upon request.

Ethics approval and consent to participate
The study was initially approved by the college of Education and Behavioral studies of Madda Walabu University. A proper letter of permission was obtained and submitted to kebeles. Information concerning the study was given to the participants.

Consent for publication
Not applicable

Con icts of Interest
The authors declare that they have no con icts of interest.