Assuming the theoretical proposal of Rubio E. called holons of sexuality, which proposes four categories integrated, determined by biological, social, and psychological factors. These work under a systemic model: Holon gender, understood as the series of ideas, attitudes, values, and concepts about what is meant by being a man or a woman and about this, the expectations that arise for each one (18); therefore, it affects the formation of gender roles and stereotypes (20). Holon affective bonding addresses the interpersonal relationships that are established with others, recognizing within them positive feelings such as love, friendship, and affection or negative feelings such as anger, resentment, and pain. Therefore, feelings are considered indispensable in the construction, maintenance, and avoidance of bonds and relationships (21). Holon eroticism refers to the series of ideas, concepts, and values that are created regarding sexual responses. Therefore, it is a human capacity that all people have to experience sexual pleasure, desire, and arousal, through biological and psychological stimulations that contribute to the construction of social representations and meanings. It should be clarified that this pleasurable response can occur on a personal level or with another (20). Holon reproductivity refers to the human potential that the person has to reproduce, but also to the functions of motherhood and paternity that he could exercise. At the psychosocial level, it involves decision-making and autonomy to decide when, with whom, and how you want to have children or if you do not want to; as well as, the ability to care for others who are not exclusively their firstborn. About the holon gender, it is evident that in the conception that the participants have of being male or female, there are no significant differences, except sex. The interviewees report that the man is associated with traits of strength, protector, responsible for the family, objective, less expressive, with greater freedom to occupy managerial positions; and is not judged socially as the woman. As for women, the interviewees associate her with procreation, perseverance, sensitivity, strength, intuition, caregiver of the harmony of the home, more subjective, expressive, fighting, passionate, and at the same time, more socially judged. At the same time, they point out that women suffer double discrimination (because they are women and have disabilities), as evidenced by the following testimonies:
"To be a man is to have the strength to take your whole family, the strength out of work, to teach your children to be good, to get ahead, that is, to put yourself on the shoulder of your whole family. The one you are going to form! ..." Carlitos
"Being a woman is something that God has given us, so beautiful, at least for me... because being a woman I have been able to have my wonderful children that I love..." Lila
As can be seen in the testimonies, ideas and concepts tinged with stereotyped traditional roles predominate, considering men as synonymous with physical strength and women as synonymous with sensitivity and reproductive roles.
As for sexuality, they consider the woman to be sexually attractive, and must have physical and aesthetic features, while the man must have traits of responsibility and respect:
"Ah... that it be pretty, beautiful...". Carlitos"
Uhm... Even if I have an important position, what prevails in me, is his personality, that he is humble, simple and... even if it's not very graceful that we say, for me, that's enough." Evelyn
Finally, we must mention that people with disabilities are frequently discriminated against, due to the denial of equality, leaving them "out" from the notion of normality/abnormality, as shown in the following testimony:
"Yes, many times I have felt stigmatized, discriminated against... it hurt at the time... to make myself visible, it was very difficult for me to be able to be where I am, discrimination as a person with a disability and discrimination as a woman." Gladys
Regarding the holon Affective bonding, the participants maintain that respect, humility and communication are important in personal relationships, and during falling in love they are linked to affections; where love means making sacrifices for the happiness of the couple and that their mere presence "fills their world". They have also experienced some feelings that became painful after a breakup.
They point out that behaviors for the construction and maintenance of interpersonal relationships are based on socially accepted norms:
"Knowing how to listen, knowing each other, uh... and know how to understand their weaknesses and strengths. Tolerance, dialogue, understanding, and communication are fundamental." Gladys
"Be kind, respectful, transparent." Lila
They consider that the assessment of friendship is based on presence and permanence, not necessarily physical:
"Ah! I lock it in one word Loyalty!" Lilac "Uhm...! I was a good friend before the accident Superfriend! I gave everything to my friends, but the accident happens to me... not one of those friends came to visit me, not to the hospital, not to the house. Vita
"For me is only a word: Loyalty!". Lila
On falling in love, they say that it allows to know the couple, establish affective bonds and courtship, look for related values, aimed at establishing commitments that can give rise to marriage or cohabitation:
"I think it is one more stage, of a sentimental bond, from a man to a woman, from woman to woman or man to man, it is one more step if you could say, to take that step of the marriage union." Gladys"
Courtship, for me, is the beginning of a relationship, of... to try to get to know each other, because then you live together or get married. You just know each other there!" Josecito
They assume that marriage is the union of a couple that requires maturity, knowledge of the person, responsibility, communication, and support:
"In marriage, to be a wife is to have a partner, to be a complement to the man, to be a person who can push you to work, together give love, form a home." Gladys
They emphasize that love is expressed through the search for the well-being of the couple:
"Oh, love! The love I think... I can enclose it in one word Tenderness!" Lila
"True love is sacrifice, if I come to love my partner or the person I chose, I have to sacrifice for her in many ways... in many ways..." Vita
They consider that, during falling in love, there are a series of emotions and feelings, loss of meaning, the reason is clouded, everything is perfect, and there is a strong desire to be together:
"It's feeling that... that there is someone in the world who makes you happy, that his very presence fills your world, fills all your emptiness, covers all your fears, more or less that." Pequeña
They also point out that, there are feelings of disappointment, where the metaphorical expression "break the heart", refers to the love disappointment, disappointment, and suffering for the loss of the couple:
"It's a disappointment if it's a disappointment. I have felt that my heart has been broken, by infidelity or betrayal, I think everyone hurts that. I felt terrible, I wanted the earth to open and I was... lock up. I felt a lot of pain..." Evelyn"
“... It broke my soul when he said I couldn't be with a person in a wheelchair." Pequeña
In the erotic holon, male participants reported that intimacy is related to sexual satisfaction and is primarily penetrative; for the interviewees, a bond of peace, surrender, communication, and trust makes their sex life healthy because there is love. It was observed that women reject masturbation and men consider pornography as a sexual stimulus. In general, participants considered that amatory involves various forms of expression and explores their erogenous zones. However, from presenting the disability several of the participants declared that their sex life ended, while others sought information to exercise it in their new condition. Men and women presented difficulty in the sexual encounter due to lack of mobility and assured that both the governments of the day and the health professionals are not interested in their sexual health, aspects that are corroborated through the following testimonies:
Women consider that intimacy alludes to a space of peace and sublime purity, while for men it is related to sexual satisfaction:
"For me, intimacy is... it is like a place, space, where two human beings like they create a sacred circle, like a safe space, a space of infinite peace, very intimate, very pure very... very sublime..." Pequeña
"It's... love, love with a woman, satisfaction, but... if you can't what are you going to do then..." Carlitos
They stated that sexuality is considered the maximum expression of love, communication, intimacy, and dedication:
"Complement of a relationship, for me sexuality is paramount" Gladys
"I believe that it is the moment when two people commune, that is, they live in a state of fullness, of ... total delivery." Pequeña
They pointed out that, sexual life is satisfactory and full if the trust, acceptance, tolerance, and communication of their preferences prevail:
"It's open, very trustworthy, that is, I can't say: Oh no, don't look at me here! Of communication, we can tell ourselves that we like it or that it is not pleasant..." Evelyn
"Oh, the truth is that I do feel full! I feel great... yes, yes... it makes me feel like if I were to renew myself, both inside and out." Pequeña
It is thought that masturbation is exclusive to men because myths still prevail:
"I once tried to masturbate, but, I didn't think it was pretty because that's how playing, it was like... who do I touch?..., I don't feel it's pleasurable to me." Gladys
"I think masturbation is a way to get sexual pleasure alone... I don't know, in the man, it's different, a woman vents through her period, right..." Evelyn
They consider pornography as a means of individual stimulation, and sexual encounters and also as therapy in cases of erectile dysfunction.
"Well, it can be a way to get stimulation in a sexual encounter, I think it's excellent, on several occasions we have resorted to it." Gladys
"Pornography sometimes helps, as a psychologist I sometimes recommend it ... I am convinced that it helps in some situations." Pequeña
Some participants experienced discomfort when witnessing Bondage and sadomasochism:
"I admit that only once did I see..., but... I didn't feel comfortable, because of the way they did it, that is, the oral sex and that, I saw that the woman had been handcuffed and they were beating her, I didn't like her"! Evelyn
In some participants, the coitocentric conception prevails:
"It's being more of a man and having more satisfaction! For both her and me, that's what's there through penetration then. ... but now I can't anymore." Carlitos
Other participants have a more comprehensive conception of sexuality, which involves various forms of expression:
"It's that there's a lot of difference, for example, in sexual intercourse they think it's penetration, but a sexual relationship is... it's getting involved, it's caresses, kisses, fiddling, things like that isn't it." Gladys
Some argue that, from the moment they presented disability, they denied any possibility of a sexual relationship:
"A sexual relationship? It is a surrender of passion, love, love as a couple, that is, during intercourse... but since my accident, I have not had sexual relations, not at all, I think I have been affected, I imagine because I do not know, because I am with a catheter, with a permanent bladder catheter ... ". Lila
As for the erogenous zones, the interviewees agree that they experience a global pleasure that goes beyond the vagina or clitoris:
"The breasts, the neck and he likes to have his penis touched, his neck." Gladys
"I admit that more, more than the clitoris itself what excites me are the caresses of the nipples, the legs, my buttocks. And he knows it!" Pequeña
They maintain that, by losing or decreasing sensitivity in the genital area, it increased in other areas:
"Uhm... a lot in the part of the armpits, abdomen, they touch me there... Your mother! Ha-ha, if someone caresses my back I also like it." Vita
They associated sexual pleasure with love, respect, valuation, rapport, and good stimulation of erogenous zones, generating a full sex life:
"Yes, I do achieve sexual pleasure, and that has happened to me because... it is like, that all actions or forms of stimulation are good, then, they are pleasant ... and that makes one reach that climax, I manage to reach orgasm, that happens to me! My sex life is healthy." Evelyn
"My sex life is pretty, pleasurable, my sexuality was completely fine, I'm multi-orgasmic, I can experience two, three, four times." Gladys
They argue that the difficulties in the sexual encounter are attributed to the lack of mobility:
"I can't move much because of my physical condition, that is, having a lot of movement I can't, but he does it, right? I can't support it... I would love to get on top of him, I can't practice some things... "Pequeña
"My sex life before the accident was more active... definitely, it was more moved, now by, by, by the member (leg) that I have lost I can not do things that I used to do then. " Josecito
They claim that sex education is a right. However, sexuality in disability remains a taboo:
"I think, with no one, zero conversations on the subject of sexuality." Carlitos
"Never, believe me, in the time that I have been working on the issue of disability ..., I proposed a project to the regional government to teach courses on sexual orientation for people with disabilities. Believe me, they didn't, they didn't accept..." Gladys
Some point out that the information was obtained from pornographic magazines, health professionals, and friends:
"A little bit, but apart from reading, huh... I like to interact sometimes with health professionals, friends who I hear them talk to sexually..." Gladys
"On behalf of my family, they never, ever talked to me about sexuality. The information I have obtained, or been able to talk to, is from friends. Sometimes it gives a little roche." Evelyn
"Ah! With my male friends, we touch on a lot of topics in the youth meetings we have, we're a group of young single adults and that's why we have that freedom to be able to touch on those topics." Vita
Another aspect that they highlighted is the scarce or no sexual training of the health team:
"After my leg was amputated, no doctor still told me about sexuality. Well, I... I believe that, if they should have informed us because it is no longer the same, one cannot do the same..." Josecito
Regarding Holon reproductivity, the participants pointed out that motherhood and paternity are part of their life plan, assuming the experience in a voluntary, responsible, and planned way, as an act of renunciation and surrender for the good of the children, which motivates them to improve themselves.
They stated that pregnancy transcends the biological; it implies a voluntary decision, a thoughtful and planned fact based on the desire of the couple.
"Ah... currently, now I do not take care of myself with any contraceptive method, I want to be a mother, with my partner we have already talked about it, now to wait..." Evelyn
"... He wanted to be a father and so did I, it was a mutual desire of both of them." Pequeña
They maintain that paternity and maternity require responsibility, and willingness to provide children with everything necessary for their adequate growth and development:
"Father... although I am not a biological father, I am a father... I have a daughter. Being a father has changed my life, I have someone to fight for, someone to live for. Not before, I took everything like this. She has changed my life... it has made me more responsible." Josecito
They emphasize that being a mother, has great meaning and value, and implies commitment:
“It's the most beautiful experience. It's a... it's a stop thinking about yourself and feeling like you have to protect your baby. It is the most sacred experience I would say, of total surrender, of renunciation of all your needs to meet the needs of that being that you have brought into the world." Pequeña
They point out that the family has violated the right to make reproductive decisions because of the myth that disability is hereditary:
"... barriers that, for my situation, are very enormous... I have gone through many very hard stages... for me, life has been very complex... to my family I said Let me live! Let me be wrong! They limit me because they are embarrassed and want me to be home! They had uncertainty because they thought my children could inherit this disability." Gladys